What Helped Me Stay Mentally Strong During IVF

Going through IVF was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. It challenged me physically, emotionally, and spiritually. But along the way, I realized that my strength didn’t just come from enduring the process—it came from intentionally choosing to keep doing the things that made me feel like me.

From the start, I promised myself: as long as I don’t give up, I will get my desired outcome. I knew I wouldn’t win every battle, but I also knew that in the bigger picture, I would win the war. That mindset helped me stay grounded. And what truly carried me through were the everyday choices I made to protect my mental health and stay connected to joy.

Here’s what helped me feel mentally strong:

• Working out. Moving my body gave me a sense of control and reminded me of my strength. Even on the days when IVF made me feel fragile, a workout was proof that my body was still capable, still powerful, still mine.

• Taking time alone to process. IVF can feel noisy—with doctors, schedules, opinions, and emotions all competing for space. Carving out quiet time for myself allowed me to process, reflect, and simply breathe.

• Working. Pouring energy into my work gave me purpose beyond the IVF process. It gave me moments where I wasn’t defined by treatments or outcomes, but by my skills and passions.

• Journaling and being outside. Writing things down and spending time in nature became grounding rituals. Both gave me perspective and helped me release the weight I was carrying.

• Time with my husband. Whether it was a trip to the beach or just an everyday adventure, planning things together gave us joy to look forward to and reminded me of the bigger picture—we were building this life and dream together.

And I want to be clear: none of this was easy. Being mentally strong didn’t mean I was always calm or fearless. Sometimes, it meant breaking down completely. It meant asking for help from friends and family when I felt like I couldn’t carry it alone. It meant admitting that I was scared—scared of the injections, scared of the outcomes, scared shitless of the unknown.

What I learned is that resilience doesn’t just come from pushing through—it comes from allowing yourself to feel it all, to crumble and rebuild, to lean on others when you need to, and to keep choosing hope despite the fear. IVF didn’t take away who I was; in fact, it forced me to lean even more into the parts of myself that make me strong.

If you’re on this journey, my advice is simple: don’t let IVF consume everything. Keep doing the things that remind you of your strength, your joy, and your identity. And remember—being strong doesn’t mean being unshaken. It means moving forward, even when you’re terrified, and knowing deep down that you will win the war.